by Holly Dare
Gerry, the local Shadow Hills teacher selected to be a housemate on CBS’s BIG BROTHER 3, has been evicted and will not win the $500,000 grand prize. But he takes with him a deeper appreciation for his family and his own personal strengths as well as newfound celebrity.
THE FOOTHILL SENTINEL spoke with Gerry the morning after his eviction. Gerry said he spent the past night just clinging to his wife whom he had not seen for 60 days, even missing their 28th anniversary. “ I signed on for this thing, they did not,” Gerry said speaking of his wife and three children.
Gerry first heard about the BIG BROTHER auditions through friends in the industry. A former commercial actor, friends encouraged him to audition. He was put through a whole battery of tests and interviews. “Sometimes there were cameras, other times just talking to people. They gave me intelligence tests and there were psychological tests to be sure I wouldn’t go bananas… this from a guy who did a gorilla impression on t.v.” When he passed the auditions, he decided to do it because “It was the opportunity to do something different and I knew the kids at school would think it was cool.”
Gerry didn’t really have to worry about taking care of paying the bills and maintaining his house as his wife and kids took care of those things. He was surprised to learn that his oldest son blew up the family car on a road trip and ended up selling it for a dollar in Salinas! “I didn’t even make enough money to buy a new car doing this… but my son did the best he could without Dad there to give him advice.”
Gerry did make arrangements with the principal at Wilson Middle School in Glendale to hire a substitute in the event he would still be in the house. Gerry was planning to be in school on the first day before spending a week finishing up his promotional duties for CBS.
The hardest part of being in the house was being “really bored.” Gerry is a self-confessed news junkie and really missed having a daily newspaper to read. “That’s why I would get up early in the morning. Living with people 24 /7 and being sensory deprived…was hard.” Gerry would spend his time in the mornings when no one was up to just think. “I spent a lot of that time trying to remember monologues from plays I had been in” just to get mental exercise.
Facing the generation gap between him and his much younger housemates was also difficult. Gerry feels that this age difference led to his ultimate eviction. When asked what he would do differently if he could relive the experience, Gerry replied, “I would have been more guarded and careful. I was pretty guarded as it was… all the kids were so extroverted, it was easy for me to hold back but if I could to it over, I would hold back even more.”
Gerry says his relationships changed over the 60 days spent in the isolated environment. At first, he formed a bond with Marcellas because “we were both ostracized.” Then he felt really close to both Jason and Roddy. “Roddy is really intelligent and can hold a great conversation and Jason’s just a really wonderful kid.” Josh is the housemate Gerry liked the least. When asked why, Gerry responded, “He’s just a fool.”
Gerry feels that Jason nominated him for eviction because Gerry had previously nominated Jason for eviction. “Jason views both of us [Roddy & Gerry] as a threat. I nominated him because, early on, he was so good. Maybe he felt that, if given the chance, I would nominate him again. He’s simply playing the game straight up with no duplicity.” Gerry said in his on camera interview that he hoped Danielle would win but in retrospect he says he hopes it’s Jason. “Jason can come through this with his integrity in tact and he is just a nice kid.”
Practical jokes were a fun pastime for the housemates and Gerry says he left a little surprise for Roddy. He hid one of the chess pieces in Roddy’s gnome. Gerry felt his days were numbered in the last week inside the house by the way he was treated saying he felt like a “pariah dog.”
Gerry hopes to stay in contact with Roddy, Jason and Marcellas. “The kids [in the house} all have grand plans about reunions and such. But I know from working on plays… people just don’t stay in touch. We’ll see.”
Acknowledging that the experience has changed him, Gerry says it’s still to early to tell just how. “ I never took my family for granted but I really appreciate them even more. I always said going in that I was a rich, rich man. My life is only richer now.” He is most proud that he was the only Head of Household to use a veto to change the eviction nominees, thereby saving Marcellas.
He is also proud that he got to live the lessons he’s tried so hard to teach his 7th & 8th grade students: to be patient and not rise to a verbal attack. “I’ve always taught them to just wait and you will prevail against someone who attacks you.”
Gerry would recommend the BIG BROTHER experience and states that someone trying to live in such an environment needs “fortitude, a good self image and broad shoulders to let stuff roll off your back. It’s hard to be with people who may not like you for who you are so a strong sense of self is necessary. A person with soul and integrity can last.”
Celebrity will be an interesting thing to cope with. Gerry is a little worried about being recognized in Ralph’s or the Union 76 where he takes his cars for repair. But he hopes to use the newfound fame to speak out on behalf of teachers and the importance of education. The number one thing that Gerry feels is wrong with education in America is the sheer lack of schools. “There aren’t enough of ‘em. We need to build more. And then the school districts need to quit interfering with teachers and let them teach. They need to realize that no one program will fix everything. We also spend way too much time testing kids. This is discouraging to even the good students.”
Gerry is anxious to get back into the routine of real life away for cameras saying he “can’t wait” for the first day of school. “ I love what I do: inspiring young minds and getting kids excited about learning.”
Originally published in the defunct Foothill Sentinel.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Tantalizing Tomatoes
An heirloom is something that is handed down from generation to generation. An heirloom tomato is a plant which is passed along from grower to grower. Why would they do this when they can just go to the local nursery? Flavor – real, rich tomato flavor.
The typical tomato plant that is mass produced these days - your Big Boy, Better Boy, Early Girl have been bred to be reliable and disease resistant. Taste was sacrificed in the process. If this is all you’ve ever planted, you don’t know what you’re missing.
Flavor aside, there is an heirloom tomato to meet any need or growing condition. You can grow by color: white, yellow, orange, green, red (how boring!), purple, black and even striped! Shape is another factor: heart, egg, coffee mug, currant, and pear are some popular choices. Taste: lighter color fruits have a milder less acidic flavor than their darker colored counterparts. Size: some varieties produce pea sized fruit; others can reach upwards of 2 pounds!
I’ve been growing around 20 varieties of heirlooms for about ten years. Other than a tomato worm attack last year, I’ve had no problems. I generally plant in early April. The soil is loosened and amended with a peat / worm casting / bat guano mix. Slow release fertilizer is added in the planting hole. Later in the season, especially if it’s hot and dry, I’ll add Miracle Grow once or twice. If you are growing Indeterminate type tomatoes, you will want to pinch back runners. This tells the plant to set fruit instead of getting bigger.
Heirloom tomato plants can be purchased through most nurseries but you may have to request them. Seeds can be purchased over the internet. Try a few in your garden this year. One bite and you’ll be hooked. Here are some of good choices to try:
Amish Paste – excellent flavor; perfect for canning
Arkansas Traveler - great in hot weather
Black Seaman – A robust, smoky tasting tomato; very dark skin; prolific plant.
Banana Legs – Long, skinny and yellow with a great fresh tomato taste.
Big Rainbow – very large fruits; red, yellow and green striped; amazing taste; not prolific.
Enchantment –smallish tomato that can handle partial shade; good flavor.
Omar’s Lebanese – rich complex flavor. Fruits average 1.5 lbs!
Pineapple – pale yellow tomato, very sweet and mild taste, 2lb fruit.
Sausage –large Roma style tomatoes look like misshapen sausages; prolific, great tasting tomato- perfect for Italian sauces or canning.
Originally published in the defunct Foothill Sentinel.
The typical tomato plant that is mass produced these days - your Big Boy, Better Boy, Early Girl have been bred to be reliable and disease resistant. Taste was sacrificed in the process. If this is all you’ve ever planted, you don’t know what you’re missing.
Flavor aside, there is an heirloom tomato to meet any need or growing condition. You can grow by color: white, yellow, orange, green, red (how boring!), purple, black and even striped! Shape is another factor: heart, egg, coffee mug, currant, and pear are some popular choices. Taste: lighter color fruits have a milder less acidic flavor than their darker colored counterparts. Size: some varieties produce pea sized fruit; others can reach upwards of 2 pounds!
I’ve been growing around 20 varieties of heirlooms for about ten years. Other than a tomato worm attack last year, I’ve had no problems. I generally plant in early April. The soil is loosened and amended with a peat / worm casting / bat guano mix. Slow release fertilizer is added in the planting hole. Later in the season, especially if it’s hot and dry, I’ll add Miracle Grow once or twice. If you are growing Indeterminate type tomatoes, you will want to pinch back runners. This tells the plant to set fruit instead of getting bigger.
Heirloom tomato plants can be purchased through most nurseries but you may have to request them. Seeds can be purchased over the internet. Try a few in your garden this year. One bite and you’ll be hooked. Here are some of good choices to try:
Amish Paste – excellent flavor; perfect for canning
Arkansas Traveler - great in hot weather
Black Seaman – A robust, smoky tasting tomato; very dark skin; prolific plant.
Banana Legs – Long, skinny and yellow with a great fresh tomato taste.
Big Rainbow – very large fruits; red, yellow and green striped; amazing taste; not prolific.
Enchantment –smallish tomato that can handle partial shade; good flavor.
Omar’s Lebanese – rich complex flavor. Fruits average 1.5 lbs!
Pineapple – pale yellow tomato, very sweet and mild taste, 2lb fruit.
Sausage –large Roma style tomatoes look like misshapen sausages; prolific, great tasting tomato- perfect for Italian sauces or canning.
Originally published in the defunct Foothill Sentinel.
Assemblage Artist Greg Delger
By Holly Dare
“It’s about love!” That’s how assemblage artist Greg Delger defines what art is to him. Greg puts his heart into every piece he creates both literally and figuratively. His eye is naturally drawn to heart shapes and he seems to find them everywhere. A heart shaped leaf or stone often becomes the focal point in his work.
Nature serves as both art and inspiration. A trip to the beach or a hike in the woods is like a shopping excursion to the art supply store.
“Nature really does the work for me. The music is there, I’m just the songwriter who puts it all together,” says Greg.
Found objects, tiny bits of origami, thread and beautiful papers are combined and layered to create a work of art. It is this combination of the natural and man-made all held together ever so delicately that is so striking.
The journey into art began when a friend needed a box for a gift. Greg made one for her, remembering an old lesson in origami. The friend was ecstatic and Greg was thrilled to see how happy the box made her. He started making tiny little boxes using nine pieces of paper to create a box, lid and an inside divider. The boxes always came with a miniature gift inside: a dried flower, a piece of sea glass or some other object that held his fascination for a moment in time.
“I love that, the second someone opens one of my boxes, all their stress is gone and for that moment, they’re happy.”
Greg’s framed pieces grew out of his origami boxes. He was always impressed that a piece of paper could become a sturdy box with just a few folds and nothing else holding it together. That same idea carried over into framed artwork. Wanting to stay true to his origami roots as his art projects got bigger, his creations contain objects that can be taken apart without being altered by glue.
A perpetual collector, Greg has quite a range of found objects on his worktable at any given time. When he begins working on a piece, he gathers a handful of items and sits on the floor. He arranges and rearranges until he comes up with a pleasing combination.
The materials can be sentimental or eclectic. A wedding gift for friends included paper from the invitation and sand from a beach that was special to the couple. Other times, the work builds around a bit of found metal.
“I know right away if a hard shape will work. It has to be the right color, have enough rust. If it doesn’t, I put it back.”
Once all the elements are in place, Greg attaches them to a backing of matte board. The hard objects are sewn down on top of pretty papers thereby holding the papers in place. Sand is an important element and has a very soothing effect on the artwork.Greg pours sand, chosen for color or sentiment, into a mint tin. A piece of glass is cut to keep the sand in the tin and yet allow it to be seen. Four twigs are placed across the corners and each end is sewn down. Thread color is equally as important as any of the other elements.
True to form, the wood used to make the frames is found on the beach or even from dumpster in the artist’s neighborhood. Office binder clips hold the covering glass to the frame and matte board and often serves as a hanger.
Greg includes elements that speak to everyone and yet are unexpected.Monopoly money and gum wrappers are there to grab the attention of the child in all of us.Two-dollar bill rings, representing Greg’s lucky number, are often included to serve as his signature. And always, at the center of it all, is heart.
Note: This artist profile was originally published in Somerset Studio magazine July / August 2003. All rights reserved.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Travel Tip - Toss Your Cookies to Save Some Dough
The best way to save money when booking a flight is to shop around. I start with AOL Travel and see what airlines fly to my destination. Then I also check the individual airlines and also check the discount sites like Best Fares, Cheap Tickets and Priceline. I’ve found the best way to get the best price is delete my cookies on my computer if I have to return to a site a second time. Some of the airline site actually raise the price if I keep checking a particular date. By tossing the cookies, I get a better price!
Submitted to an online magazine looking for travel tips.
Submitted to an online magazine looking for travel tips.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Seven Pounds of Doubt on Ben Button's Revolutionary Road
I got a cold Christmas Day. And I was lucky enough to get my mitts on dvds for some just released movies.
Seven Pounds (HUGE SPOILER ALERT HERE!): I actually saw this in the theatre last week with a buddy from film school. I've always been one of those annoying people that can spot holes in a plot a mile off. I'm known to lean over to my movie going partner and whisper, "The butler did it."
I was looking forward to this because there was supposedly some big surprise that would keep me riveted to my seat. There was no surprise; it was not riveting. Maybe if they hadn't told us in the first two minutes that Will Smith's character would commit suicide before the end of the movie, I could have gotten into it. But they did and I didn't.
Within twenty minutes, I was squirming in my seat and had to ask my friend, "You know where this is going?" "Yep." "Bored?" "Yep."
Once there was no mystery, there was nothing to do but sit back and enjoy the acting. Will Smith is tortured in his roll of a man who killed seven people texting while driving...including his beloved wife. Is it his best roll? Not by a mile.
Rosario Dawson was heartbreaking as a heart patient and this the only performance of Woody Harrelson's that I've ever enjoyed.
Smith's character proceeds through the movie checking out the seven people he will leave his organs to - making sure they are "good people." And midway through, you easily figure out how he's going to off himself. But the other huge plot hole for me is - I think they reject organs from a poisoned patient...
Wait for video on this one but, if you are jonesing for a good Will Smith flick, see Six Degrees of Separation. I first saw this movie because I loved the play and adore Stockard Channing and Donald Sutherland. I thought Smith was surely miscast in his first film role. He stole the show and I came away adie hard fan.
If you would rather see a movie with a less transparent plot and you are one of the seven people on the planet who hasn't seen it, rent The Sixth Sense.
Doubt is the star of all the movies I've seen. The actors are spot on, the scenery is perfect as are the costumes. There is nothing bad to say here. I probably wouldn't have seen this in the theatre - the subject matter of a priest sexually abusing a child is disturbing to me. And yet it is wonderful and definitely worth seeing on the big screen. I usually hate stories with vague endings that let the viewer make up their own mind but this film is just beautiful.
Meryl Streep is simply on fire and certainly deserves another Oscar for this one.
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button was annoyingly long at almost three hours! Thank goodness I watched in stages from the comfort of my sofa! I can't imagine being in an uncomfortable theatre for that long!
The story is about a baby born an old man who ages backwards, getting younger as time marches on. While Cate Blanchett always brings wonder and depth and honesty to any performance, Brad Pitt's performance was flat. I tried to chalk it up to being born with wisdom - no need to calm down as you age. But there was never any passion or fire in him even when he won his long lost love nor when he had to leave her.
New Orleans serves as a backdrop and it was lovely to see the Old Gal in her glory. But the whole movie feels like some kind of would-be Forrest Gump. I can actually envision the studio pitch session with the lame ass studio executive listening intently: "Yeah man, it's the new Gump, only instead of Alabama, he's from New Orleans. Instead of running across the country and meeting presidents, he'll be a sailor traveling the world meeting interesting people. Instead of being an army hero, his tug boat will get commissioned into the war... Instead of 'life is like a box of chocolates' we've got......" OK, here is where I get lost! The catch phrase we're supposed to take away is COMPLETELY FORGETTABLE! It's along the lines of "You never know what's comin'" I didn't think the end of this movie was comin'.
Button is a CGI (computer generated imagery) wonder and will certainly win awards for that but it is long and tedious and despite the promised tear jerker, I only teared up a bit when he was speaking about what he wanted for his daughter. My advice: wait for video.
Revolutionary Road celebrates the first pairing of Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio since Titanic. They do have a chemistry about them. Winslet's character mourns her once hoped for life as an actress, dreams cast aside when she got pregnant. DiCaprio's character is a guy just doing the right thing, working at a job he hates to take care of the family.
The movie rarely shows them in happy times so we have no idea what really binds them together. We just see the ugly, nasty fights which are really sad and mean. And the make-ups are even stranger. After a horrible fight, he will return home or wake up and she's in the kitchen and dressed and cooking and forcing happiness. "Hello dear, how would you like your eggs?"
It's an astounding juxtaposition and made me wonder if she was bi-polar or just one of those many 1950's housewives who "needed" barbiturates.
The couple comes up with a plan to recapture some of the glory of their youth, before the kids and the house in the burbs. Then an unexpected pregnancy derails it. I found myself wondering about how many people must have their lives, hopes and dreams dashed in this way.
The movie is a sad commentary on marriage but all of the performances were wonderful. The most annoying part, aside from the downer of a plot, was Winslet's wardrobe. While the other women were dressed in the 1950's, Winslet's character didn't seem to know from whence decade she came. It made me wonder if the wardrobe department or director Sam Mendes (Winslet's real life hubby) gave the actress a little too much say in the costumes.
If you can handle a depressing plot during the most depressing time of the year, this movie is worth a trip to the mega-plex for the acting alone. Kathy Bates is also terrific in her role as a neighbor and realtor.
First published on Creekhiker 12/28/08
Seven Pounds (HUGE SPOILER ALERT HERE!): I actually saw this in the theatre last week with a buddy from film school. I've always been one of those annoying people that can spot holes in a plot a mile off. I'm known to lean over to my movie going partner and whisper, "The butler did it."
I was looking forward to this because there was supposedly some big surprise that would keep me riveted to my seat. There was no surprise; it was not riveting. Maybe if they hadn't told us in the first two minutes that Will Smith's character would commit suicide before the end of the movie, I could have gotten into it. But they did and I didn't.
Within twenty minutes, I was squirming in my seat and had to ask my friend, "You know where this is going?" "Yep." "Bored?" "Yep."
Once there was no mystery, there was nothing to do but sit back and enjoy the acting. Will Smith is tortured in his roll of a man who killed seven people texting while driving...including his beloved wife. Is it his best roll? Not by a mile.
Rosario Dawson was heartbreaking as a heart patient and this the only performance of Woody Harrelson's that I've ever enjoyed.
Smith's character proceeds through the movie checking out the seven people he will leave his organs to - making sure they are "good people." And midway through, you easily figure out how he's going to off himself. But the other huge plot hole for me is - I think they reject organs from a poisoned patient...
Wait for video on this one but, if you are jonesing for a good Will Smith flick, see Six Degrees of Separation. I first saw this movie because I loved the play and adore Stockard Channing and Donald Sutherland. I thought Smith was surely miscast in his first film role. He stole the show and I came away a
If you would rather see a movie with a less transparent plot and you are one of the seven people on the planet who hasn't seen it, rent The Sixth Sense.
Doubt is the star of all the movies I've seen. The actors are spot on, the scenery is perfect as are the costumes. There is nothing bad to say here. I probably wouldn't have seen this in the theatre - the subject matter of a priest sexually abusing a child is disturbing to me. And yet it is wonderful and definitely worth seeing on the big screen. I usually hate stories with vague endings that let the viewer make up their own mind but this film is just beautiful.
Meryl Streep is simply on fire and certainly deserves another Oscar for this one.
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button was annoyingly long at almost three hours! Thank goodness I watched in stages from the comfort of my sofa! I can't imagine being in an uncomfortable theatre for that long!
The story is about a baby born an old man who ages backwards, getting younger as time marches on. While Cate Blanchett always brings wonder and depth and honesty to any performance, Brad Pitt's performance was flat. I tried to chalk it up to being born with wisdom - no need to calm down as you age. But there was never any passion or fire in him even when he won his long lost love nor when he had to leave her.
New Orleans serves as a backdrop and it was lovely to see the Old Gal in her glory. But the whole movie feels like some kind of would-be Forrest Gump. I can actually envision the studio pitch session with the lame ass studio executive listening intently: "Yeah man, it's the new Gump, only instead of Alabama, he's from New Orleans. Instead of running across the country and meeting presidents, he'll be a sailor traveling the world meeting interesting people. Instead of being an army hero, his tug boat will get commissioned into the war... Instead of 'life is like a box of chocolates' we've got......" OK, here is where I get lost! The catch phrase we're supposed to take away is COMPLETELY FORGETTABLE! It's along the lines of "You never know what's comin'" I didn't think the end of this movie was comin'.
Button is a CGI (computer generated imagery) wonder and will certainly win awards for that but it is long and tedious and despite the promised tear jerker, I only teared up a bit when he was speaking about what he wanted for his daughter. My advice: wait for video.
Revolutionary Road celebrates the first pairing of Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio since Titanic. They do have a chemistry about them. Winslet's character mourns her once hoped for life as an actress, dreams cast aside when she got pregnant. DiCaprio's character is a guy just doing the right thing, working at a job he hates to take care of the family.
The movie rarely shows them in happy times so we have no idea what really binds them together. We just see the ugly, nasty fights which are really sad and mean. And the make-ups are even stranger. After a horrible fight, he will return home or wake up and she's in the kitchen and dressed and cooking and forcing happiness. "Hello dear, how would you like your eggs?"
It's an astounding juxtaposition and made me wonder if she was bi-polar or just one of those many 1950's housewives who "needed" barbiturates.
The couple comes up with a plan to recapture some of the glory of their youth, before the kids and the house in the burbs. Then an unexpected pregnancy derails it. I found myself wondering about how many people must have their lives, hopes and dreams dashed in this way.
The movie is a sad commentary on marriage but all of the performances were wonderful. The most annoying part, aside from the downer of a plot, was Winslet's wardrobe. While the other women were dressed in the 1950's, Winslet's character didn't seem to know from whence decade she came. It made me wonder if the wardrobe department or director Sam Mendes (Winslet's real life hubby) gave the actress a little too much say in the costumes.
If you can handle a depressing plot during the most depressing time of the year, this movie is worth a trip to the mega-plex for the acting alone. Kathy Bates is also terrific in her role as a neighbor and realtor.
First published on Creekhiker 12/28/08
Thursday, June 4, 2009
JUST CAN'T GET ENOUGH REALITY T.V.
By Holly Dare/ Special to the Star
Reality TV makes for great watching. It's so popular that Fox network will be launching an all-reality-all-the-time network next month.
To the networks, reality shows are a great investment with low production costs and a potentially big payoff. Network programmers love making cheap shows. Reality shows require little in terms of actual production. No high-priced sets, no over-priced stars, no make-up or wardrobe people. They often don't even require much in the way of a shooting crew: a few cameramen and a sound guy are really all that are needed. And, they are shot on videotape unlike most one-hour dramas or quality sitcoms which are shot on costly film.
There are no writers to pay either. Most writers probably couldn't dream this stuff up, with truth being stranger than fiction.
Because the 'bottom line' is God in Hollywood, these shows are relatively low-risk. If it doesn't work, the networks haven't invested much. They simply walk away and create a new reality.
Reality shows allow viewers to face their fears vicariously. Some see this as a bonus. Afraid of bugs crawling over your body or eating animal brains? Watch "Fear Factor." Ever wonder what it's like to live with your total opposite? Watch "Strange Love." Want to know what it's like to do stupid stunts? Try "Jackass" or "Knievel's Wild Ride." Have a fantasy of living life as a bounty hunter? "Dog the Bounty Hunter" is for you.
And if you want to figure out if you can be lost and actually survive on a desert island, there is the granddaddy of them all - still going strong - "Survivor."
By watching others in seemingly life-threatening situations, the viewer imagines himself in the driver's seat. He faces his fear, gets an exhilarating high from watching and tunes in week after week, guaranteeing that the network profits.
Viewers that don't identify with that philosophy will take comfort in knowing that there's always someone out there with worse problems. Just take a look at "Dr. Phil" and all the sad, pathetic people who confess their sins and plead for help. Like a proverbial train wreck, we can't help but watch.
Networks will keep producing such shows and they should. After all, no one's getting hurt.
First published on 4/20/05 in the Opinion Section of the L.A. Valley Star.
Reality TV makes for great watching. It's so popular that Fox network will be launching an all-reality-all-the-time network next month.
To the networks, reality shows are a great investment with low production costs and a potentially big payoff. Network programmers love making cheap shows. Reality shows require little in terms of actual production. No high-priced sets, no over-priced stars, no make-up or wardrobe people. They often don't even require much in the way of a shooting crew: a few cameramen and a sound guy are really all that are needed. And, they are shot on videotape unlike most one-hour dramas or quality sitcoms which are shot on costly film.
There are no writers to pay either. Most writers probably couldn't dream this stuff up, with truth being stranger than fiction.
Because the 'bottom line' is God in Hollywood, these shows are relatively low-risk. If it doesn't work, the networks haven't invested much. They simply walk away and create a new reality.
Reality shows allow viewers to face their fears vicariously. Some see this as a bonus. Afraid of bugs crawling over your body or eating animal brains? Watch "Fear Factor." Ever wonder what it's like to live with your total opposite? Watch "Strange Love." Want to know what it's like to do stupid stunts? Try "Jackass" or "Knievel's Wild Ride." Have a fantasy of living life as a bounty hunter? "Dog the Bounty Hunter" is for you.
And if you want to figure out if you can be lost and actually survive on a desert island, there is the granddaddy of them all - still going strong - "Survivor."
By watching others in seemingly life-threatening situations, the viewer imagines himself in the driver's seat. He faces his fear, gets an exhilarating high from watching and tunes in week after week, guaranteeing that the network profits.
Viewers that don't identify with that philosophy will take comfort in knowing that there's always someone out there with worse problems. Just take a look at "Dr. Phil" and all the sad, pathetic people who confess their sins and plead for help. Like a proverbial train wreck, we can't help but watch.
Networks will keep producing such shows and they should. After all, no one's getting hurt.
First published on 4/20/05 in the Opinion Section of the L.A. Valley Star.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Dining in Buenos Aires
Restaurant review / travel log written from memory with a little research many years after I lived there.
After a few meals out in Buenos Aires, it becomes apparent that, succulent Argentine beef aside, all restaurants are the same. I find the food is adequate, even tasty, but it’s mundane and forgettable. From corner café to grand parilla, the menus are as predictable as the sunrise.
In every dining establishment, I find the obligatory steak, fantastic hamburgers, the egg dish, the fish dish and always, the Argentine version of French fries. It is as if by trying to please everyone, they fail to please anyone. Those humdrum pappas fritas are a good example. They are perfectly fried golden potatoes with dressed up with garlic and parsley – it really makes you homesick for just plain old French fries. And while salt is readily available, don’t dare make the mistake of asking for pepper – a mistake I’ve made in far too many restaurants.
No matter what type of establishment I’m in, the scene is always the same: The waiter will stare at me, dumbstruck and then utters in a high pitched voice, “Pimenta?” Wearing disgust on his face, he marches off to the kitchen, informing everyone along the way that some American idiot wants to ruin her food with pimenta. He eventually returns with pepper- the fries are now cold – and gathers the other waiters around to watch how this strange ingredient is used. Pack your own pepper; it’ll save lots of embarrassment.
The other phrase to be aware of is “con jamòn” or with ham. Everything comes with ham. No kidding. Apparently, this is where the ham in hamburger originated. Order a steak, it comes with ham. Melon? Yep. Ham. If you don’t love ham, learn this phrase and utter it every time you order: sin (seen) jamòn (without ham).
While thousands visit Buenos Aires every year and seem perfectly happy to partake of gastronomic predictability, to find an interesting meal – with or without ham- throw away the tour book and talk to some locals. If your Spanish is rusty, try British tourists as they seem to have better guidebooks.
It was a Brit that led me to Brocolino’s, clearly the best Italian restaurant in
Argentina – and probably even the world. It’s that good. It is a noisy, family joint down a dark street. It’s easy to hurry past Esmerelda, as it intersects with the busy Florida shopping district. It seems like a good place to get mugged. Yet, there’s always people, huddling in the dark, headed somewhere…Brocolino’s.
It’s a really ugly restaurant. Most Argentine buildings are brown or tan and it’s shocking to walk into the most hideous bright green room off the darkened street. But the waiter’s greet you in Spanish and make you feel like an old friend. If you’re not sure what to order, they just start bringing you food.
The pasta is perfect al dente; the sauce robust with lots of garlic. Angel hair with garlic and oil (Aglio e olio) is a stinking rose lover’s delight. Be prepared to smell garlic coming out of your pores for at least 24 hours. By then, you’ll be craving more.
El Teatro should be on every tourist list – it’s located right next to the world famous Teatro Colòn opera house, a popular destination. Yet the large parilla is filled with animated and loud locals. Ah, but this grill is different. Because of the locality to the opera, El Teatro doesn’t feel like the average barbeque place. The patrons are nicely dressed and the décor is rich with green plants and lots of velvet. I was extra lucky on my visit as I was traveling with well-known actors. We were seated in the lush balcony overlooking the main dining area.
The menu has the usual assortment of grilled meats but there is lighter fare here. The salad is made from variety of greens instead of the usual hunk of iceberg. The house dressing is rich with tarragon. The grilled chicken has been marinated in a salt bath and then buttermilk before grilling. El Teatro also serves a dish that is more common at home barbeques: provoleta. A nice sized chunk of provolone, dipped in oil and herbs, grilled until the inside melts and the outside is crispy, is brought on a steaming plate with a basket of soft bread. I am certain this dish caused me to gain at least ten pounds during my extended stay, and worth every ounce.
For Sunday morning breakfast, try the Florida Café. Omelets abound at every restaurant, but the Florida makes pancakes. While they are not fluffy – more likely close cousins with a crepe –they are a wonderful remedy for the homesick. Having been in B’aires for weeks and missing my Sunday ritual of pancakes, this was a welcome find. Syrup is not to be found but the panqueques are served with a thinned dulce de leche. “Milk jam” is made from sugar and milk, cooked to a milk chocolate brown and appears in almost every sweet Argentinean dish, usually in a thick and chewy mass. At Florida, the thin caramel is a refreshing accompaniment to breakfast fare, served on toast and muffins as well as pancakes.
It is at the Florida where I notice another commonality with all Argentinean restaurants: a waiter will never pour cold milk into coffee. It must be scalding hot before being decanted from three feet above the table into a coffee cup.
In the quest for unusual fare in B’Aires led me to several Chinese restaurants, only to be disappointed with the greasy, over-cooked food. Then we heard of Mongolian Barbeque. The cab dropped us off on a wet winter eve in front of what looked like a house in a non-commercial neighborhood. Our ride was out of sight as our group discovered the door was locked. Realizing we were a good two miles off any major thoroughfare and possible taxi stand, we bundled up for a long walk in the rain. We didn’t make it very far when we heard a woman call to us in Spanish with Chinese accent.
She let us in and explained in English that 7:30 p.m.is very early for dinner in Argentina. She sat us at a fireside table and brought a fine red wine from the San Juan region while we waited for the cooks to finish setting up. There was a cold bar of meat: beef, pork, chicken and shrimp, as well as an assortment of vegetables and sauces. Simply fill a bowl, hand it to the cook and a waiter brings it to the table. The chicken was moist and tender, the vegetables crisp and perfect. By 9 p.m. the tiny restaurant was filled with the laughter of neighborhood locals and our gracious hostess called us a cab. If trying Mongolian Barbeque, plan on dining late and knock on the window if the door is locked.
If you are willing to travel a little for a great meal, Gato–Blanco (White Cat) is a destination dining experience. I wasn’t sure what to expect when a friend suggested we go to a restaurant that required traveling by boat. Located a couple hours from downtown Buenos Aires by both bus and boat, this restaurant, in Tigre, is on an island on the Rio Capitán, one of the many rivers and inlets off the Rio Paraña.
Gato-Blanco reminds me of one of the many restaurants my family used to visit by boat on lazy Sunday afternoons in the Louisianabayous, band blaring and smells of something good coming from the kitchen. Sure, you could get there by car, but why would you want to?
The trip to Gato-Blanco is the beginning of a fun, relaxing day. The boat hums through the wide river delta and gives an up-close view of how the elite of South America live. I really loved looking at the breathtaking houses with expansive lawns that butt up to the river. Every house has a “boat elevator” that lifts a boat high into the air so that another may dock beneath it.
The restaurant also has a large dock and lawn chairs right on the river. There are interior and exterior dining areas as well as a bar and tea room. The front yard is a large, park-like garden with playground equipment for the kids. And yes, there is a white cat hiding in the foliage.
The food is filling and needed after the boat ride. Grilled shrimp with garlic is a house specialty as is a flat fish served with lemon and champagne. Red meat lovers will go for the sirloin stuffed with mushrooms, ham, cheese, potatoes and cream.
After dining on such rich food, a walk along the riverbank is needed. Or hang near the band; strangers will ask you to dance. By late afternoon, it is time to board the boat back to the bus depot. The chill coming off the water on a June winter night makes it possible to sit in the waning sun while wearing my thick coat. The warm sun, the great meal digesting and the gentle rocking of the boat make it impossible for me to stay awake. A long nap ends a terrific day and I’m ready for the more populated destinations in Buenos Aires.
Brocolino’s
Esmerlda 776
Buenos Aires (Florida District)
Inexpensive
El Teatro
Toscanini 1288
Buenos Aires (Recoleta District)
Moderate
Café Florida
Cordoba 399
Buenos Aires (Florida District)
Inexpensive
Mongolian Barbeque
Avenida Las Heras 3357
Buenos Aires (Palermo District)
Moderate
Gato-Blanco
Río Capitán nº 80 Delta del Paraná CP (1648)
Tigre - Buenos Aires – Argentina
Moderate
After a few meals out in Buenos Aires, it becomes apparent that, succulent Argentine beef aside, all restaurants are the same. I find the food is adequate, even tasty, but it’s mundane and forgettable. From corner café to grand parilla, the menus are as predictable as the sunrise.
In every dining establishment, I find the obligatory steak, fantastic hamburgers, the egg dish, the fish dish and always, the Argentine version of French fries. It is as if by trying to please everyone, they fail to please anyone. Those humdrum pappas fritas are a good example. They are perfectly fried golden potatoes with dressed up with garlic and parsley – it really makes you homesick for just plain old French fries. And while salt is readily available, don’t dare make the mistake of asking for pepper – a mistake I’ve made in far too many restaurants.
No matter what type of establishment I’m in, the scene is always the same: The waiter will stare at me, dumbstruck and then utters in a high pitched voice, “Pimenta?” Wearing disgust on his face, he marches off to the kitchen, informing everyone along the way that some American idiot wants to ruin her food with pimenta. He eventually returns with pepper- the fries are now cold – and gathers the other waiters around to watch how this strange ingredient is used. Pack your own pepper; it’ll save lots of embarrassment.
The other phrase to be aware of is “con jamòn” or with ham. Everything comes with ham. No kidding. Apparently, this is where the ham in hamburger originated. Order a steak, it comes with ham. Melon? Yep. Ham. If you don’t love ham, learn this phrase and utter it every time you order: sin (seen) jamòn (without ham).
While thousands visit Buenos Aires every year and seem perfectly happy to partake of gastronomic predictability, to find an interesting meal – with or without ham- throw away the tour book and talk to some locals. If your Spanish is rusty, try British tourists as they seem to have better guidebooks.
It was a Brit that led me to Brocolino’s, clearly the best Italian restaurant in
Argentina – and probably even the world. It’s that good. It is a noisy, family joint down a dark street. It’s easy to hurry past Esmerelda, as it intersects with the busy Florida shopping district. It seems like a good place to get mugged. Yet, there’s always people, huddling in the dark, headed somewhere…Brocolino’s.
It’s a really ugly restaurant. Most Argentine buildings are brown or tan and it’s shocking to walk into the most hideous bright green room off the darkened street. But the waiter’s greet you in Spanish and make you feel like an old friend. If you’re not sure what to order, they just start bringing you food.
The pasta is perfect al dente; the sauce robust with lots of garlic. Angel hair with garlic and oil (Aglio e olio) is a stinking rose lover’s delight. Be prepared to smell garlic coming out of your pores for at least 24 hours. By then, you’ll be craving more.
El Teatro should be on every tourist list – it’s located right next to the world famous Teatro Colòn opera house, a popular destination. Yet the large parilla is filled with animated and loud locals. Ah, but this grill is different. Because of the locality to the opera, El Teatro doesn’t feel like the average barbeque place. The patrons are nicely dressed and the décor is rich with green plants and lots of velvet. I was extra lucky on my visit as I was traveling with well-known actors. We were seated in the lush balcony overlooking the main dining area.
The menu has the usual assortment of grilled meats but there is lighter fare here. The salad is made from variety of greens instead of the usual hunk of iceberg. The house dressing is rich with tarragon. The grilled chicken has been marinated in a salt bath and then buttermilk before grilling. El Teatro also serves a dish that is more common at home barbeques: provoleta. A nice sized chunk of provolone, dipped in oil and herbs, grilled until the inside melts and the outside is crispy, is brought on a steaming plate with a basket of soft bread. I am certain this dish caused me to gain at least ten pounds during my extended stay, and worth every ounce.
For Sunday morning breakfast, try the Florida Café. Omelets abound at every restaurant, but the Florida makes pancakes. While they are not fluffy – more likely close cousins with a crepe –they are a wonderful remedy for the homesick. Having been in B’aires for weeks and missing my Sunday ritual of pancakes, this was a welcome find. Syrup is not to be found but the panqueques are served with a thinned dulce de leche. “Milk jam” is made from sugar and milk, cooked to a milk chocolate brown and appears in almost every sweet Argentinean dish, usually in a thick and chewy mass. At Florida, the thin caramel is a refreshing accompaniment to breakfast fare, served on toast and muffins as well as pancakes.
It is at the Florida where I notice another commonality with all Argentinean restaurants: a waiter will never pour cold milk into coffee. It must be scalding hot before being decanted from three feet above the table into a coffee cup.
In the quest for unusual fare in B’Aires led me to several Chinese restaurants, only to be disappointed with the greasy, over-cooked food. Then we heard of Mongolian Barbeque. The cab dropped us off on a wet winter eve in front of what looked like a house in a non-commercial neighborhood. Our ride was out of sight as our group discovered the door was locked. Realizing we were a good two miles off any major thoroughfare and possible taxi stand, we bundled up for a long walk in the rain. We didn’t make it very far when we heard a woman call to us in Spanish with Chinese accent.
She let us in and explained in English that 7:30 p.m.is very early for dinner in Argentina. She sat us at a fireside table and brought a fine red wine from the San Juan region while we waited for the cooks to finish setting up. There was a cold bar of meat: beef, pork, chicken and shrimp, as well as an assortment of vegetables and sauces. Simply fill a bowl, hand it to the cook and a waiter brings it to the table. The chicken was moist and tender, the vegetables crisp and perfect. By 9 p.m. the tiny restaurant was filled with the laughter of neighborhood locals and our gracious hostess called us a cab. If trying Mongolian Barbeque, plan on dining late and knock on the window if the door is locked.
If you are willing to travel a little for a great meal, Gato–Blanco (White Cat) is a destination dining experience. I wasn’t sure what to expect when a friend suggested we go to a restaurant that required traveling by boat. Located a couple hours from downtown Buenos Aires by both bus and boat, this restaurant, in Tigre, is on an island on the Rio Capitán, one of the many rivers and inlets off the Rio Paraña.
Gato-Blanco reminds me of one of the many restaurants my family used to visit by boat on lazy Sunday afternoons in the Louisianabayous, band blaring and smells of something good coming from the kitchen. Sure, you could get there by car, but why would you want to?
The trip to Gato-Blanco is the beginning of a fun, relaxing day. The boat hums through the wide river delta and gives an up-close view of how the elite of South America live. I really loved looking at the breathtaking houses with expansive lawns that butt up to the river. Every house has a “boat elevator” that lifts a boat high into the air so that another may dock beneath it.
The restaurant also has a large dock and lawn chairs right on the river. There are interior and exterior dining areas as well as a bar and tea room. The front yard is a large, park-like garden with playground equipment for the kids. And yes, there is a white cat hiding in the foliage.
The food is filling and needed after the boat ride. Grilled shrimp with garlic is a house specialty as is a flat fish served with lemon and champagne. Red meat lovers will go for the sirloin stuffed with mushrooms, ham, cheese, potatoes and cream.
After dining on such rich food, a walk along the riverbank is needed. Or hang near the band; strangers will ask you to dance. By late afternoon, it is time to board the boat back to the bus depot. The chill coming off the water on a June winter night makes it possible to sit in the waning sun while wearing my thick coat. The warm sun, the great meal digesting and the gentle rocking of the boat make it impossible for me to stay awake. A long nap ends a terrific day and I’m ready for the more populated destinations in Buenos Aires.
Brocolino’s
Esmerlda 776
Buenos Aires (Florida District)
Inexpensive
El Teatro
Toscanini 1288
Buenos Aires (Recoleta District)
Moderate
Café Florida
Cordoba 399
Buenos Aires (Florida District)
Inexpensive
Mongolian Barbeque
Avenida Las Heras 3357
Buenos Aires (Palermo District)
Moderate
Gato-Blanco
Río Capitán nº 80 Delta del Paraná CP (1648)
Tigre - Buenos Aires – Argentina
Moderate
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Movie Review: Milk
The night I got the stomach flu, I was out with a friend to see a preview of Milk, starring Sean Penn. The movie is so amazing and I need to issue a Spoiler Alert for the simple reason, I doubt this movie will even get the play time it so deserves in middle America.
The Gus Van Sant helmed film about the life of seventies gay activist Harvey Milk is an incredible and surprisingly timely story. The casting is uncanny: all three major characters (Milk, Councilman Dan White and Mayor Moscone) are played by dead ringer actors (Penn, Josh Brolin and my favorite song and dance man, Victor Garber respectively).
The movie opens as Harvey Milk, living in the closet in New York picks up a younger man, played by James Franco. The two end up moving to San Fransisco and starting a business Castro Camera.
At first, conservative Southern Belle that I am, I was a bit concerned about the sex scenes... this was San Fransisco in the seventies: pre-AIDS, let's sleep with everybody, freewheeling seventies. And Van Sant is not known for his discretion. But they were really pretty mild. There is one tender moment early in the movie with Fraco's Scott Smith character sitting on a ledge in front of the camera store. Sean Penn as Milk was squatting on the ground and the two were making out. It felt so tender and personal that I felt as like I was some voyeur watching a very private moment.
While the Castro was quickly becoming a mostly gay community, homosexuals were still regularly beaten and even barred from some businesses. Milk quickly organized the gay community. They would boycott businesses that refused to do business with them. Even business owners who initially shunned homosexuals could not deny the power of their dollars.
Milk started running for public office by approaching groups who lacked representation: gays, hippies in the Height and the elderly. Still he lost several times. All the while, he has clearly become a leader in Castro and gay community thanks to a fight against Prop 6 and Anita Bryant. Prop 6 made firing of gay teachers mandatory. Even if you weren't gay but supported them, you could be fired.
How timely that the gay community is fighting a similar battle with Prop 8 here in California and in other states that refuse to give them the right to marry...even though a marriage provides different rights than a civil union would.
After one such loss, Milk gathers his inner circle and asks them if they are out. Most nod in agreement.
Then he asks again: Are you out to your parents, your siblings, your friends, co-workers, neighbors, your boss? Are you out to everyone you know? The room grows quiet. He hands a phone to one man and says, "If they know one of us, they vote with us.
I can't go into the ending and Milk's murder...I got ill and missed the last twenty minutes and will the see the movie again for that. But what I saw was beautiful and amazing.
Mr. Milk, I know many of you. I care about my friends and I love them deeply. I'm proud to stand beside you and vote for equal rights for ALL!
Written for Creekhiker
The Gus Van Sant helmed film about the life of seventies gay activist Harvey Milk is an incredible and surprisingly timely story. The casting is uncanny: all three major characters (Milk, Councilman Dan White and Mayor Moscone) are played by dead ringer actors (Penn, Josh Brolin and my favorite song and dance man, Victor Garber respectively).
The movie opens as Harvey Milk, living in the closet in New York picks up a younger man, played by James Franco. The two end up moving to San Fransisco and starting a business Castro Camera.
At first, conservative Southern Belle that I am, I was a bit concerned about the sex scenes... this was San Fransisco in the seventies: pre-AIDS, let's sleep with everybody, freewheeling seventies. And Van Sant is not known for his discretion. But they were really pretty mild. There is one tender moment early in the movie with Fraco's Scott Smith character sitting on a ledge in front of the camera store. Sean Penn as Milk was squatting on the ground and the two were making out. It felt so tender and personal that I felt as like I was some voyeur watching a very private moment.
While the Castro was quickly becoming a mostly gay community, homosexuals were still regularly beaten and even barred from some businesses. Milk quickly organized the gay community. They would boycott businesses that refused to do business with them. Even business owners who initially shunned homosexuals could not deny the power of their dollars.
Milk started running for public office by approaching groups who lacked representation: gays, hippies in the Height and the elderly. Still he lost several times. All the while, he has clearly become a leader in Castro and gay community thanks to a fight against Prop 6 and Anita Bryant. Prop 6 made firing of gay teachers mandatory. Even if you weren't gay but supported them, you could be fired.
How timely that the gay community is fighting a similar battle with Prop 8 here in California and in other states that refuse to give them the right to marry...even though a marriage provides different rights than a civil union would.
After one such loss, Milk gathers his inner circle and asks them if they are out. Most nod in agreement.
Then he asks again: Are you out to your parents, your siblings, your friends, co-workers, neighbors, your boss? Are you out to everyone you know? The room grows quiet. He hands a phone to one man and says, "If they know one of us, they vote with us.
I can't go into the ending and Milk's murder...I got ill and missed the last twenty minutes and will the see the movie again for that. But what I saw was beautiful and amazing.
Mr. Milk, I know many of you. I care about my friends and I love them deeply. I'm proud to stand beside you and vote for equal rights for ALL!
Written for Creekhiker
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
"Cinderella" Story on DVD
"Cinderella Man"
Director: Ron Howard
Features: Russell Crowe and Renée Zellweger
5 out of 5 stars
"Cinderella Man," back in theaters and new on DVD this week, is worthy in any format. It is one of those rare, moving, true stories - if submitted in a non-fiction writing class, it would get an F for being unbelievable. The film is certainly worthy of the price of theater admission and the DVD has some really outstanding features.
"Cinderella Man" is the life story of '30s boxer James J. "Gentleman Jim" Braddock and his wife Mae, passionately portrayed by Oscar winners Russell Crowe and Renée Zellweger. Braddock had some success in the late 1920s, but after the stock market crash, the family - the couple had three children - fell on difficult times. Braddock's bad luck followed him into the ring. He lost his boxing license and struggled to find work to feed the family and keep the heat on during those frigid New Jersey winters.
That's where the story took its Cinderella-like turn. In 1934, a last-minute cancellation on an undercard fight gave Braddock an unexpected chance. And to everyone's surprise, he won and kept on winning, eventually facing the much-feared Max Baer for the title.
The movie provides a look into the life of a man who publicly rose to greatness but was driven by far simpler motivations: the love of his wife and family and the need to keep them together and fed. Directed by Ron Howard ("A Beautiful Mind," "The Missing"), "Cinderella Man" truly gives the viewer a sense of the desperate times this country faced in the Great Depression.
The film is back in theaters, presumably to give Howard, Crowe, Zellweger and company a run at the Oscars. When the movie was first released earlier this year, Universal Studios took the unusual step of offering a money-back guarantee to viewers as a show of faith in the movie.
The DVD is loaded with extras. There are three voiceover commentaries from Howard, and one by each of the writers. Howard's is the most relevant; it would have made sense to combine the two writers' tracks into one. The DVD also features a descriptive visual service (DVS) audio track for the blind.
On the flip side of the disc, there is a deleted scenes section - a must see. Often these scenes were left on the cutting room floor for a good reason. Not so with these. Each deleted scene gives even more insight into these characters as well as the actors' performances.
There are also several documentaries included. They cover casting, making the film, boxing history, and the real-life family of Braddock.
Boxing fans will enjoy the boxing history feature with Angelo Dundee, trainer of Muhammad Ali, who has a small role in the movie. Everyone will enjoy the interviews with the Braddock family. Their pride in the accomplishments of their father and grandfather as well as their love for the man comes shining through.
James Braddock was a rock-solid, good and decent man. "Cinderella Man" beautifully portrays his life and times.
First published 12/14/05 in the Valley Life Section of the L.A. Valley Star.
Director: Ron Howard
Features: Russell Crowe and Renée Zellweger
5 out of 5 stars
"
"
That's where the story took its Cinderella-like turn. In 1934, a last-minute cancellation on an undercard fight gave Braddock an unexpected chance. And to everyone's surprise, he won and kept on winning, eventually facing the much-feared Max Baer for the title.
The movie provides a look into the life of a man who publicly rose to greatness but was driven by far simpler motivations: the love of his wife and family and the need to keep them together and fed. Directed by Ron Howard ("A Beautiful Mind," "The Missing"), "Cinderella Man" truly gives the viewer a sense of the desperate times this country faced in the Great Depression.
The film is back in theaters, presumably to give Howard, Crowe, Zellweger and company a run at the Oscars. When the movie was first released earlier this year, Universal Studios took the unusual step of offering a money-back guarantee to viewers as a show of faith in the movie.
The DVD is loaded with extras. There are three voiceover commentaries from Howard, and one by each of the writers. Howard's is the most relevant; it would have made sense to combine the two writers' tracks into one. The DVD also features a descriptive visual service (DVS) audio track for the blind.
On the flip side of the disc, there is a deleted scenes section - a must see. Often these scenes were left on the cutting room floor for a good reason. Not so with these. Each deleted scene gives even more insight into these characters as well as the actors' performances.
There are also several documentaries included. They cover casting, making the film, boxing history, and the real-life family of Braddock.
Boxing fans will enjoy the boxing history feature with Angelo Dundee, trainer of Muhammad Ali, who has a small role in the movie. Everyone will enjoy the interviews with the Braddock family. Their pride in the accomplishments of their father and grandfather as well as their love for the man comes shining through.
James Braddock was a rock-solid, good and decent man. "Cinderella Man" beautifully portrays his life and times.
First published 12/14/05 in the Valley Life Section of the L.A. Valley Star.
Wednesday, November 9, 2005
"Jarhead" Provides Jarring Look at War
"Jarhead," based on the acclaimed book by Anthony Swofford, provides a fresh and unsettling look at the first Gulf War, which was packaged so antiseptically by the armed forces and news media. The title refers to the nickname Marines give themselves because their newly shaven heads resemble jars.
We follow "Swoff," beautifully played by Jake Gyllenhaal ("Moonlight Mile," "Day After Tomorrow"), as a third-generation enlistee from boot camp to active duty as a sniper. We experience it all: the hazing by fellow troops, a friendly fire killing of a fellow trainee, Swoff's demotion for drinking on Christmas Eve, which led to a fire in the camp, and his punishment - burning the crap from the latrines.
Throughout, Gyllenhaal provides a voice-over check list for every detail of his hurry-up-and-wait life: "Things a marine needs to burn [the contents] of a latrine: five gallons of diesel, a long metal pole and an incendiary device."
The cast is rounded out by Peter Sarsgaard ("Flightplan," "Skeleton Key") as a fellow sniper, Academy Award-winners Jamie Foxx and Chris Cooper ("Adaptation"), and the always-reliable Dennis Haysbert ("Far From Heaven"). Sam Mendes ("American Beauty," "Road to Perdition") helmed.
The movie is a beautifully shot, no-holds-barred look at Marine life that takes us along on the roller coaster of emotions faced by this group. We fear for Swoff and company as they take fire from both Iraqis and Americans. We feel their anguish as they realize wives and girlfriends have moved on with their lives stateside. Shock fills the theater as the viewer realizes how all the watchful waiting wears on Swoff.
Time is the most important element of the film. The Marine's naiveté at just how long it will take them to "kick Iraqi [butt]" and end this war- two days. The long, drawn out waiting in the Saudi Arabian desert for combat to begin - 175 days, 14 hours and five minutes. The length of Swoff's actual war.
Early in the film, Swoff explains that, to him, the nickname Jarhead is not only literal - the way the Marines look - it also implies that they are empty vessels waiting to be filled. Each Jarhead takes away experiences that will last their lifetimes. "Jarhead" will have a lasting impact on the viewer as well.
First published 11/09/05 in the Valley Life section of the L.A. Valley Star.
Sunday, November 30, 2003
Dear Aunt Sister - December 03
When I wrote for the now defunct Foothill Sentinel, I was the ghost writer for the Dear Aunt Sister advice column. When writing the column, I channel my beloved aunt, born in 1913, known affectionately to her five brothers and all their offspring as "Sister." She handled everything with charm, fantastic wit and always a twinkle in her eye.
Dear Aunt Sister,
Christmas is approaching fast and our kids want so much. We work hard for everything we give them. Is it wrong to let them the fat guy in the red suit does it all?
Under-appreciated Mom & Dad
Dear Mom & Dad,
It is up to you to help yourself, but let me give you an idea. In our family, St. Nick brings every child three (and ONLY three) gifts: Something they need, something they want, and something “just because”. The theory behind the three gifts gives parents the opportunity to remind children why we celebrate Christmas in the first place. That was the number of presents the Christ child got. Every other gift comes from someone the child knows and can thank properly.
Now, as for the reference to my dear friend Santa’s weight, a subject about which he is very sensitive: You’re going to end up on his Naughty List. You better be writing to him to apologize or you’re going get coal in your stocking!
Dear Aunt Sister,
Christmas is approaching fast and our kids want so much. We work hard for everything we give them. Is it wrong to let them the fat guy in the red suit does it all?
Under-appreciated Mom & Dad
Dear Mom & Dad,
It is up to you to help yourself, but let me give you an idea. In our family, St. Nick brings every child three (and ONLY three) gifts: Something they need, something they want, and something “just because”. The theory behind the three gifts gives parents the opportunity to remind children why we celebrate Christmas in the first place. That was the number of presents the Christ child got. Every other gift comes from someone the child knows and can thank properly.
Now, as for the reference to my dear friend Santa’s weight, a subject about which he is very sensitive: You’re going to end up on his Naughty List. You better be writing to him to apologize or you’re going get coal in your stocking!
Wednesday, September 3, 2003
Dear Aunt Sister - September 03
When I wrote for the now defunct Foothill Sentinel, I was the ghost writer for the Dear Aunt Sister advice column. When writing the column, I channel my beloved aunt, born in 1913, known affectionately to her five brothers and all their offspring as "Sister." She handled everything with charm, fantastic wit and always a twinkle in her eye.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I recently threw a party for a small group of people. They spilled food on my floor and left it there. Plates and cups were left all around the house and patio. Someone spilled a drink and made no effort to help clean it up.
I was taught to clean up after myself. What’s wrong with these people?
Tired of Partying with Pigs
Dear Hostess,
Not everyone was raised with the good manners you have. It sounds as if some of your friends were raised in a zoo! Unfortunately, all you can really do is continue to lead by example.
As hostess, you can let people know what you expect of them. As you serve them, tell them where the trash can is or where to leave the plates. Hand them extra napkins and say, “Just in case you spill…” Ease the burden by asking someone to stay and help clean up.
You also have the option of only inviting the neat ones next time. Let the “pig” wallow in his own mess.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I recently threw a party for a small group of people. They spilled food on my floor and left it there. Plates and cups were left all around the house and patio. Someone spilled a drink and made no effort to help clean it up.
I was taught to clean up after myself. What’s wrong with these people?
Tired of Partying with Pigs
Dear Hostess,
Not everyone was raised with the good manners you have. It sounds as if some of your friends were raised in a zoo! Unfortunately, all you can really do is continue to lead by example.
As hostess, you can let people know what you expect of them. As you serve them, tell them where the trash can is or where to leave the plates. Hand them extra napkins and say, “Just in case you spill…” Ease the burden by asking someone to stay and help clean up.
You also have the option of only inviting the neat ones next time. Let the “pig” wallow in his own mess.
Friday, August 1, 2003
Dear Aunt Sister - August 03
When I wrote for the now defunct Foothill Sentinel, I was the ghost writer for the Dear Aunt Sister advice column. When writing the column, I channel my beloved aunt, born in 1913, known affectionately to her five brothers and all their offspring as "Sister." She handled everything with charm, fantastic wit and always a twinkle in her eye.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I read that article about misleading price signs at stores. That very same thing has happened to me. I complained to the sales clerk. She just shrugged and walked away. She didn’t even take the sign with the wrong price down. I was so disgusted, I left. It’s so frustrating, I wish I never had to go shopping there again. Unfortunately, this happens at many stores I shop at.
Aunt Sister, what should I do when this happens again? Why don’t these stores care about the image they present to the public?
Perplexed Shopper
Dear Shopper,
I too have thought I picked up a bargain only to be disappointed on checkout. However, when I feel the clerk doesn’t understand or will remedy the situation, I always ask for the manager. Once, I got an assistant manager who was actually very rude. I made a point to go back to that store and speak with the actual manager. Unfortunately, not many of us are not willing to spend the time it takes to be heard. But if you want satisfaction, you must be willing to spend the time, even if you have to figure out how to reach their corporate office.
As for why the stores don’t care about their image – maybe that would be a good question for the manager.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have a neighbor that sunbathes in the nude. He put up a really tall fence around his property but I can still see him through the cracks. I think he should be ashamed at his indecency! What can I do to let him know this is a “nice” neighborhood and that he should swim in trunks?
No Birthday Suit for Me!
Dear Suit,
Nice neighborhood? Why hardly! Not with peeping toms like you around! Keep your eyeballs on your side of the fence before your neighbor has you arrested!
Dear Aunt Sister,
I read that article about misleading price signs at stores. That very same thing has happened to me. I complained to the sales clerk. She just shrugged and walked away. She didn’t even take the sign with the wrong price down. I was so disgusted, I left. It’s so frustrating, I wish I never had to go shopping there again. Unfortunately, this happens at many stores I shop at.
Aunt Sister, what should I do when this happens again? Why don’t these stores care about the image they present to the public?
Perplexed Shopper
Dear Shopper,
I too have thought I picked up a bargain only to be disappointed on checkout. However, when I feel the clerk doesn’t understand or will remedy the situation, I always ask for the manager. Once, I got an assistant manager who was actually very rude. I made a point to go back to that store and speak with the actual manager. Unfortunately, not many of us are not willing to spend the time it takes to be heard. But if you want satisfaction, you must be willing to spend the time, even if you have to figure out how to reach their corporate office.
As for why the stores don’t care about their image – maybe that would be a good question for the manager.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have a neighbor that sunbathes in the nude. He put up a really tall fence around his property but I can still see him through the cracks. I think he should be ashamed at his indecency! What can I do to let him know this is a “nice” neighborhood and that he should swim in trunks?
No Birthday Suit for Me!
Dear Suit,
Nice neighborhood? Why hardly! Not with peeping toms like you around! Keep your eyeballs on your side of the fence before your neighbor has you arrested!
Tuesday, July 1, 2003
Dear Aunt Sister - July '03
When I wrote for the now defunct Foothill Sentinel, I was the ghost writer for the Dear Aunt Sister advice column. When writing the column, I channel my beloved aunt, born in 1913, known affectionately to her five brothers and all their offspring as "Sister." She handled everything with charm, fantastic wit and always a twinkle in her eye.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have a friend who sees movies the second they come out. It annoys me when she tells me the plot of a film I want to see.
I ask her not to, but she keeps right on going. I hardly even go to the movies anymore because of my friend. What can I do to keep her from spilling the beans about every movie that comes out?
Sign me,
Why bother?
Dear friend,
The question should ask is why are you happy with a friend who doesn’t take your request seriously.
Here’s what you can do: When your friend tries to mention a film you haven’t seen, plug your ears and start singing very loud! That should shut the bean spiller up quickly.
Dear Aunt Sister,
My mother had a stroke recently. It is so much work to care for her around the clock. But that’s not what I’m writing about. A family friend stops by several times a week. She does not go into Mom’s room to visit with her. She does not do a load of wash or bring groceries or ask if there is anything I need.
She does show up at lunch time, expects me to prepare her a meal and doesn’t even thank me. She says she “just wanted to stop by and support me during this difficult time.”
Aunt Sister, just what is “support?”
Confused Caregiver
Dear Caregiver,
You are right to question the meaning of support. Many out there do not get it.
Folks tell me they support The Sentinel, but when questioned on how they do that, they respond that they read the paper.
How is picking up a free paper support?
In your situation, your friend may think she is giving you emotional support, when in fact she is causing you stress. If you can’t simply tell her how you feel, give her something to do. When she arrives, ask her to pick up the living room, visit with your mother or prepare lunch for you and your mother.. And, if she does do something, don’t forget to thank her for her support.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have a friend who sees movies the second they come out. It annoys me when she tells me the plot of a film I want to see.
I ask her not to, but she keeps right on going. I hardly even go to the movies anymore because of my friend. What can I do to keep her from spilling the beans about every movie that comes out?
Sign me,
Why bother?
Dear friend,
The question should ask is why are you happy with a friend who doesn’t take your request seriously.
Here’s what you can do: When your friend tries to mention a film you haven’t seen, plug your ears and start singing very loud! That should shut the bean spiller up quickly.
Dear Aunt Sister,
My mother had a stroke recently. It is so much work to care for her around the clock. But that’s not what I’m writing about. A family friend stops by several times a week. She does not go into Mom’s room to visit with her. She does not do a load of wash or bring groceries or ask if there is anything I need.
She does show up at lunch time, expects me to prepare her a meal and doesn’t even thank me. She says she “just wanted to stop by and support me during this difficult time.”
Aunt Sister, just what is “support?”
Confused Caregiver
Dear Caregiver,
You are right to question the meaning of support. Many out there do not get it.
Folks tell me they support The Sentinel, but when questioned on how they do that, they respond that they read the paper.
How is picking up a free paper support?
In your situation, your friend may think she is giving you emotional support, when in fact she is causing you stress. If you can’t simply tell her how you feel, give her something to do. When she arrives, ask her to pick up the living room, visit with your mother or prepare lunch for you and your mother.. And, if she does do something, don’t forget to thank her for her support.
Thursday, May 1, 2003
Dear Aunt Sister - May 03
When I wrote for the now defunct Foothill Sentinel, I was the ghost writer for the Dear Aunt Sister advice column. When writing the column, I channel my beloved aunt, born in 1913, known affectionately to her five brothers and all their offspring as "Sister." She handled everything with charm, fantastic wit and always a twinkle in her eye.
Dear Aunt Sister,
My husband and I earn extra money by selling items online. We do very well with this. When my best friend asked me about our side business, I told her everything: how much we made, who our supplier was, etc. Last month, she and her husband beat us to our supplier and bought up the inventory we usually purchase and then sold the items online. I am furious with her! How do I get her to stop?
Lost out
Dear Lost,
Friendship is one thing; business is another. She’s not going to stop. Would you? You need to find another supplier or product and get busy.
You should be furious with yourself, not your friend! After all, you’re the one who spilled the beans! In the future, don’t be tempted to give away your “trade secrets.”
****************
Dear Aunt Sister:
Thank you for your column from "Blooming Mad" about missing flowers. Pretty sad that people take flowers without asking, however my situation is like that of the business owners on Foothill with regard to people stealing entire plants.
I moved here less than a year ago, the yard was mostly dirt and weeds. I've put so much work into beautifying my place, only to have someone come along and remove entire plants from the parkway and even from my front yard! This is really hard to handle when you personally invest time, money and your own sweat!
Little trails of dirt and petals were the only clue I had to go on until I actually spied the culprit very early one morning. She was gone from sight when I got outside but fortunately, a passerby happened to know where she lived. I went to the house and there adorning the front flowerbed were "my" plants!!!! I knocked on the door, explained the situation, and got to digging! I was able to retrieve most of my plants but since the smaller ones were now so big I told them I'd only take the bigger more expensive plants back. Getting some of them back made me feel a little triumphant! No more plants have disappeared, but I have to admit, I do drive by her house and look.
"The Lone Gardener"
Dear Gardener,
You are one gutsy gardener to confront a thief at her own front door. I appreciate feedback from my readers.
Dear Aunt Sister,
My husband and I earn extra money by selling items online. We do very well with this. When my best friend asked me about our side business, I told her everything: how much we made, who our supplier was, etc. Last month, she and her husband beat us to our supplier and bought up the inventory we usually purchase and then sold the items online. I am furious with her! How do I get her to stop?
Lost out
Dear Lost,
Friendship is one thing; business is another. She’s not going to stop. Would you? You need to find another supplier or product and get busy.
You should be furious with yourself, not your friend! After all, you’re the one who spilled the beans! In the future, don’t be tempted to give away your “trade secrets.”
****************
Dear Aunt Sister:
Thank you for your column from "Blooming Mad" about missing flowers. Pretty sad that people take flowers without asking, however my situation is like that of the business owners on Foothill with regard to people stealing entire plants.
I moved here less than a year ago, the yard was mostly dirt and weeds. I've put so much work into beautifying my place, only to have someone come along and remove entire plants from the parkway and even from my front yard! This is really hard to handle when you personally invest time, money and your own sweat!
Little trails of dirt and petals were the only clue I had to go on until I actually spied the culprit very early one morning. She was gone from sight when I got outside but fortunately, a passerby happened to know where she lived. I went to the house and there adorning the front flowerbed were "my" plants!!!! I knocked on the door, explained the situation, and got to digging! I was able to retrieve most of my plants but since the smaller ones were now so big I told them I'd only take the bigger more expensive plants back. Getting some of them back made me feel a little triumphant! No more plants have disappeared, but I have to admit, I do drive by her house and look.
"The Lone Gardener"
Dear Gardener,
You are one gutsy gardener to confront a thief at her own front door. I appreciate feedback from my readers.
Tuesday, April 1, 2003
Dear Aunt Sister - April 03
When I wrote for the now defunct Foothill Sentinel, I was the ghost writer for the Dear Aunt Sister advice column. When writing the column, I channel my beloved aunt, born in 1913, known affectionately to her five brothers and all their offspring as "Sister." She handled everything with charm, fantastic wit and always a twinkle in her eye.
Dear Aunt Sister,
All this sentimentality about Mother's Day makes me sick. I know a lot of mothers who shouldn't be mothers the way they treat their kids. So why are we telling them how wonderful they are, when they're not?
Disillusioned
Dear Disillusioned,
I understand exactly what you mean. Years ago, I was in a restaurant with a couple who had a toddler. He was hungry and wanted his bottle but his mother would place it just out of reach. The baby would reach and stretch and then, give up. His mother would move it closer. When he finally could grasp it, she would slap his hands.
This memory stands out for me for two reasons: 1) I had never seen anyone is deliberately abusive to such a small child. 2) That child did not even cry – which tells me he was used to it. How sad that even mothers like this are celebrated with cards and gifts on Mother’s Day.
It’s a shame that one gets elected to lifetime membership in the motherhood “club” simply by giving birth. Unfortunately, while we live in a society that that mandates tests for everything from driving to citizenship, the only test you must pass to become a mother is biological. All I can offer you as an answer is celebrate those who deserve it. Pray for the others.
Dear Aunt Sister,
Help! My family is ready to move out of our dream house because of our next door neighbor, “Judy.” Judy is so nosey. She constantly calls with such personal questions as, “Where did you go so late last night?” or “Whose car is that in your driveway? I don’t recognize it.” Judy is constantly in our business. Four other neighbors have moved because of this woman!
Aunt Sister, I love my house but I feel abused by this woman. What do I do?
Packing
Dear Packing,
What do you do? Start by growing a backbone, girl! As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” You allow this woman to invade your privacy. You have the power stop it!
Judy craves information; give her none. Be as vague as possible. Or, answer her with questions of your own – in your very sweetest voice, of course. Try “Why on earth would you ask such a thing?” or “Why do you want to know?” That should get you’re your point across.
Dear Aunt Sister,
All this sentimentality about Mother's Day makes me sick. I know a lot of mothers who shouldn't be mothers the way they treat their kids. So why are we telling them how wonderful they are, when they're not?
Disillusioned
Dear Disillusioned,
I understand exactly what you mean. Years ago, I was in a restaurant with a couple who had a toddler. He was hungry and wanted his bottle but his mother would place it just out of reach. The baby would reach and stretch and then, give up. His mother would move it closer. When he finally could grasp it, she would slap his hands.
This memory stands out for me for two reasons: 1) I had never seen anyone is deliberately abusive to such a small child. 2) That child did not even cry – which tells me he was used to it. How sad that even mothers like this are celebrated with cards and gifts on Mother’s Day.
It’s a shame that one gets elected to lifetime membership in the motherhood “club” simply by giving birth. Unfortunately, while we live in a society that that mandates tests for everything from driving to citizenship, the only test you must pass to become a mother is biological. All I can offer you as an answer is celebrate those who deserve it. Pray for the others.
Dear Aunt Sister,
Help! My family is ready to move out of our dream house because of our next door neighbor, “Judy.” Judy is so nosey. She constantly calls with such personal questions as, “Where did you go so late last night?” or “Whose car is that in your driveway? I don’t recognize it.” Judy is constantly in our business. Four other neighbors have moved because of this woman!
Aunt Sister, I love my house but I feel abused by this woman. What do I do?
Packing
Dear Packing,
What do you do? Start by growing a backbone, girl! As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” You allow this woman to invade your privacy. You have the power stop it!
Judy craves information; give her none. Be as vague as possible. Or, answer her with questions of your own – in your very sweetest voice, of course. Try “Why on earth would you ask such a thing?” or “Why do you want to know?” That should get you’re your point across.
Saturday, March 1, 2003
Dear Aunt Sister - March '03
When I wrote for the now defunct Foothill Sentinel, I was the ghost writer for the Dear Aunt Sister advice column. When writing the column, I channel my beloved aunt, born in 1913, known affectionately to her five brothers and all their offspring as "Sister." She handled everything with charm, fantastic wit and always a twinkle in her eye.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have a neighbor who picks flowers from my yard. She never asks if she can have them. Sometimes she even pulls up a whole plant.
Other than this, we are on good terms. I don’t really want to confront her, but I do want her to stop.
Bloomin’ Mad
Dear Bloom,
This is a problem in our fair city. I have even heard our merchants complain of people taking entire plants! Once, I had a neighbor put a small coffee can in her front garden with a sign reading “Flowers $1.00.” Her problem did diminish but never quite went away.
It is a frustrating problem. The one who expends the time, effort and money to maintain a garden should be the one to enjoy the garden. With this in mind, why don’t you start watering your garden with your neighbor’s hose? You will only have to do this a few times before she gets the message.
***********
Dear Aunt Sister
My neighbor has the saddest dog you'd ever want to see. He gets feed regularly but that's about it. They don't play with him or pay any attention to him. Why do people have animals if they don't care about them?
Sad
Dear Sad,
I would suggest that you learn the dog’s name. Talk to him through the fence using his name every chance you get. If you know your neighbors, ask if you can walk him. And if you get the sense that they really don’t want the animal, maybe you could take him in or offer to find him a good home.
Considering that people raise their children the same way these days, what do you expect? We live in a time where everyone is so busy and self-centered. They race around all day and yet want some sort of family life when they get home. They adopt animals without thinking about what kind of life the poor creatures will have. But you can make a difference in this dog’s life if you take action.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have a neighbor who picks flowers from my yard. She never asks if she can have them. Sometimes she even pulls up a whole plant.
Other than this, we are on good terms. I don’t really want to confront her, but I do want her to stop.
Bloomin’ Mad
Dear Bloom,
This is a problem in our fair city. I have even heard our merchants complain of people taking entire plants! Once, I had a neighbor put a small coffee can in her front garden with a sign reading “Flowers $1.00.” Her problem did diminish but never quite went away.
It is a frustrating problem. The one who expends the time, effort and money to maintain a garden should be the one to enjoy the garden. With this in mind, why don’t you start watering your garden with your neighbor’s hose? You will only have to do this a few times before she gets the message.
***********
Dear Aunt Sister
My neighbor has the saddest dog you'd ever want to see. He gets feed regularly but that's about it. They don't play with him or pay any attention to him. Why do people have animals if they don't care about them?
Sad
Dear Sad,
I would suggest that you learn the dog’s name. Talk to him through the fence using his name every chance you get. If you know your neighbors, ask if you can walk him. And if you get the sense that they really don’t want the animal, maybe you could take him in or offer to find him a good home.
Considering that people raise their children the same way these days, what do you expect? We live in a time where everyone is so busy and self-centered. They race around all day and yet want some sort of family life when they get home. They adopt animals without thinking about what kind of life the poor creatures will have. But you can make a difference in this dog’s life if you take action.
Saturday, February 1, 2003
Dear Aunt Sister - February '03
When I wrote for the now defunct Foothill Sentinel, I was the ghost writer for the Dear Aunt Sister advice column. When writing the column, I channel my beloved aunt, born in 1913, known affectionately to her five brothers and all their offspring as "Sister." She handled everything with charm, fantastic wit and always a twinkle in her eye.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have wonderful husband who is attentive and loving. My only complaint? I can’t seem to get him to remember Valentine’s Day. Should I let him off the hook for always forgetting this special day?
No Heart-Shaped Candy for Me
Dear Heart,
Maybe he’s just forgetful. Try dropping a few hints as the day approaches.
You have really NO complaint. There are many women out there who would treasure such an attentive and loving man. You should count your blessings. Besides, think of all the calories he’s saving you.
*************************
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have been dating my boyfriend for five years. I want an engagement ring more than anything for Valentine’s Day. How do I get him to pop the question?
Thanks, Anxious Lady In Waiting
P.S. I’m 38 and he’s 40
Dear Lady,
If you’ve been with this man for five years, you should be more than comfortable asking what his intentions are. However, I think you should be asking yourself why you’ve spent five years just “dating” the same man.
Honey, at your age, it’s time to fish or cut bait. Tell him what you want and when you want it. If he doesn’t deliver, move on and don’t look back.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have wonderful husband who is attentive and loving. My only complaint? I can’t seem to get him to remember Valentine’s Day. Should I let him off the hook for always forgetting this special day?
No Heart-Shaped Candy for Me
Dear Heart,
Maybe he’s just forgetful. Try dropping a few hints as the day approaches.
You have really NO complaint. There are many women out there who would treasure such an attentive and loving man. You should count your blessings. Besides, think of all the calories he’s saving you.
*************************
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have been dating my boyfriend for five years. I want an engagement ring more than anything for Valentine’s Day. How do I get him to pop the question?
Thanks, Anxious Lady In Waiting
P.S. I’m 38 and he’s 40
Dear Lady,
If you’ve been with this man for five years, you should be more than comfortable asking what his intentions are. However, I think you should be asking yourself why you’ve spent five years just “dating” the same man.
Honey, at your age, it’s time to fish or cut bait. Tell him what you want and when you want it. If he doesn’t deliver, move on and don’t look back.
Wednesday, January 1, 2003
Dear Aunt Sister - January 03
When I wrote for the now defunct Foothill Sentinel, I was the ghost writer for the Dear Aunt Sister advice column. When writing the column, I channel my beloved aunt, born in 1913, known affectionately to her five brothers and all their offspring as "Sister." She handled everything with charm, fantastic wit and always a twinkle in her eye.
Dear Aunt Sister,
Yet another Christmas has come and, once again, I have received another sweater that I will never wear. I haven’t worn sweaters since I was in grade school (many years ago). I would take it back to the store, but I know the person who gave it to me would be offended. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Hot blooded
Dear Hot,
It seems there are a lot of people who buy gifts just to have something, anything to give. They are only giving you something to make themselves feel good. I find such grievous gift giving TACKY, TACKY, TACKY! They obviously didn’t care what you thought or they wouldn’t have been so careless choosing your gift. Why do you care so much about offending them? You should take the gift back. How will the present giver ever know if you don’t tell?
*************************
Dear Aunt Sister,
Every New Years, I make my resolutions and they are all broken by the end of the week! What can I do to make me stick to my resolutions?
Perplexed
Dear Perplexed,
Why don’t you make a resolution to keep your resolutions?
Just kidding, dear.
I find that lists work for me. I will make several lists and post them everywhere: On the bathroom mirror, the fridge, by my favorite chair. By keeping my goals where I can see them in black in white, it reminds me daily to stay focused on them.
If this doesn’t work, maybe you need to ask yourself why the resolutions you are making are not that important to you.
Dear Aunt Sister,
Yet another Christmas has come and, once again, I have received another sweater that I will never wear. I haven’t worn sweaters since I was in grade school (many years ago). I would take it back to the store, but I know the person who gave it to me would be offended. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Hot blooded
Dear Hot,
It seems there are a lot of people who buy gifts just to have something, anything to give. They are only giving you something to make themselves feel good. I find such grievous gift giving TACKY, TACKY, TACKY! They obviously didn’t care what you thought or they wouldn’t have been so careless choosing your gift. Why do you care so much about offending them? You should take the gift back. How will the present giver ever know if you don’t tell?
*************************
Dear Aunt Sister,
Every New Years, I make my resolutions and they are all broken by the end of the week! What can I do to make me stick to my resolutions?
Perplexed
Dear Perplexed,
Why don’t you make a resolution to keep your resolutions?
Just kidding, dear.
I find that lists work for me. I will make several lists and post them everywhere: On the bathroom mirror, the fridge, by my favorite chair. By keeping my goals where I can see them in black in white, it reminds me daily to stay focused on them.
If this doesn’t work, maybe you need to ask yourself why the resolutions you are making are not that important to you.
Sunday, December 1, 2002
Dear Aunt Sister - December 2002
When I wrote for the now defunct Foothill Sentinel, I was the ghost writer for the Dear Aunt Sister advice column. When writing the column, I channel my beloved aunt, born in 1913, known affectionately to her five brothers and all their offspring as "Sister." She handled everything with charm, fantastic wit and always a twinkle in her eye.
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have a friend who I’ll call Sue. I have treasured her friendship for many years. Sue recently stopped calling and returning phone calls. I ran into her at a social event and asked her what was going on. Sue told me she’s tired of my asking her advice and then not following it. This friend means a lot to me. What can I do?
Flabergasted
Dear Friend,
What Sue is failing to realize is that when we ask our friends for advice, it is a way of exploring options. It is impossible for you to follow Sue’s advice to the letter because you are NOT Sue!
If you feel the friendship is salvageable, find a way to let her know how her advice has helped you to solve some of your problems, but tell her, too, that you need to do what is right for you. But before you do, ask yourself why you want to be friends with someone who doesn’t want you to make your own decisions.
*************************************************************
HELP! Christmas is coming and our kids want so much. It’s not that we mind buying for them, but why does the fat guy in the red suit have to get all the credit?
Under-appreciated Mom & Dad
Dear Mom and Dad,
It is up to you to help yourself, but let me give you an idea. In our family, St. Nick brings every child three (and ONLY three) gifts: Something they need, something they want, and something “just because.” The theory behind the three gifts gives parents the opportunity to remind children why we celebrate Christmas in the first place. That was the number of presents the Christ child got. Every other gift comes from someone the child knows and can thank properly.
We work hard idea - why does the fat guy in the red suit have to get all the credit?
Now, as for the reference to my dear friend Santa’s weight, a subject about which he is very sensitive: You’re going to end up on his Naughty List. You better be writing to him to apologize or you’re going get coal in your stocking!
Dear Aunt Sister,
I have a friend who I’ll call Sue. I have treasured her friendship for many years. Sue recently stopped calling and returning phone calls. I ran into her at a social event and asked her what was going on. Sue told me she’s tired of my asking her advice and then not following it. This friend means a lot to me. What can I do?
Flabergasted
Dear Friend,
What Sue is failing to realize is that when we ask our friends for advice, it is a way of exploring options. It is impossible for you to follow Sue’s advice to the letter because you are NOT Sue!
If you feel the friendship is salvageable, find a way to let her know how her advice has helped you to solve some of your problems, but tell her, too, that you need to do what is right for you. But before you do, ask yourself why you want to be friends with someone who doesn’t want you to make your own decisions.
*************************************************************
HELP! Christmas is coming and our kids want so much. It’s not that we mind buying for them, but why does the fat guy in the red suit have to get all the credit?
Under-appreciated Mom & Dad
Dear Mom and Dad,
It is up to you to help yourself, but let me give you an idea. In our family, St. Nick brings every child three (and ONLY three) gifts: Something they need, something they want, and something “just because.” The theory behind the three gifts gives parents the opportunity to remind children why we celebrate Christmas in the first place. That was the number of presents the Christ child got. Every other gift comes from someone the child knows and can thank properly.
We work hard idea - why does the fat guy in the red suit have to get all the credit?
Now, as for the reference to my dear friend Santa’s weight, a subject about which he is very sensitive: You’re going to end up on his Naughty List. You better be writing to him to apologize or you’re going get coal in your stocking!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
